Alcoholics dating custody
23-Mar-2020 10:29
I have happily represented many outstanding recovering alcoholic parents in family court and some of these parents have obtained custody of their children and done a fantastic job raising them. The alcoholic parents whose representation I considered to be successful were in recovery and were committed to not drinking.In too many cases I have observed alcoholic parents who were not in recovery destroy their custody case (and their relationship with their children) by continuing to drink. I found myself in a constant loop of trying to explain the truth to someone who was set on twisting it. My heart wanted him to match the image he created of himself. No matter how hard I swam away from it, I was inevitably sucked down into the undertow of his reality. I got burned and then expected the person who put me in that fire to heal my wounds and get me out. There is nothing I can ever do or say that will be right. I will have an eternal hole in the place of many unanswered questions. And the reality of who he is underneath the image he presents the world will likely never change. On the outside, he presented the image of a loving, Christian husband and father. Despite the many times he proved that was, in fact, a lie, I still wanted to believe the lie. As time went on, I began feeling the heat in a different way.Unless you have objective evidence, such as a handful of DUI convictions or stints at a treatment facility, it will probably come down to a "he says-she says" type of trial.Obviously, substance abuse will be an important issue when the court is awarding custody of minor children.
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You'll have to prove the habitual nature of the issue, since mere occasional drunkenness or regular moderate drinking is probably not going to be enough.
In the same manner, occasional weekend binges or "functional" alcoholism (in which the spouse successfully holds down a job despite continual drinking) might not suffice either.
However, you don't have to bring a fault divorce based on alcoholism to raise it during custody hearings. Berkeley's law school, Teo Spengler is up on education.
While a spouse who drinks moderately won’t get eliminated from seeking custody, family law courts will take a close look at any substance abuse issue that might impact parenting. She splits her home time between San Francisco and France. (Maybe it was in that moment that my heart and my brain switched places, leading me down this very misguided path.) That night, he had me. I am careful not to diagnose him with a personality disorder, particularly because when substance abuse muddies the water, it’s hard to know what really lies beneath it.