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Only about 30% of women orgasm without clitoral stimulation, says licensed psychologist Laurie Mintz, Ph D.So if sex for you doesn’t directly involve your clit—either with manual stimulation or via sexual positions that hit it (woman-on-top often does)—coming isn’t going to be in the cards."Hot tub chemicals, caffeine, and even stress can promote vaginal dryness, too,” says Mintz.
Or slip your guy a little nighttime reading: She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman by Ian Kerner is excellent, she says. “The clitoral glands are located at least 2 centimeters above the vaginal entrance, so when most men and women have sex, the clitoris is rarely touched, which is why many women don’t orgasm during intercourse,” he explains. And the method for doing so—"physical therapy for your vagina,“ says Louann Brizendine, MD—isn’t that different from training your abs or biceps.“Just as a flaccid penis is very different than an erect penis, the vaginal canal is a different organ when you’re intensely aroused," Brizendine explains. “Those in which both partners are content with near to no sex and, much more common, those in which one partner is very worried about it and the other is not.” If you fall into the concerned camp, she advocates the “Just Do It” approach.Instead, she suggests experimenting with sexual positions to find one that stimulates the clitoris and the most sensitive area of the vaginal canal. “The more sex you have, the more you want,” she explains.Orgasms, tightening, and all other bedroom mysteries.
(Photo: Claire Benoist)Why can’t I orgasm during sex? Your solo sure-thingis all about the clitoris, right?
Only about 30% of women orgasm without clitoral stimulation, says licensed psychologist Laurie Mintz, Ph D.