Playing waiting game dating my daughter is dating a black
As a marketing nerd, let me just say this does NOT work for me. I like being able to anticipate traction and success to a certain degree. You’ll move onto the next man, but you will always wonder what happened.
The mind games muddy the testing waters and you’re left wondering…
An unemployed man who is still “finding himself” in his 30’s? A man who is comfortable with not only you being the breadwinner, but you making ALL the important decisions in your lives and partnership?
What complicates matters more are pre-existing patterns, modern gender roles, and generational differences. A man who’s self-confidence equals or may even overshadow my own.
If it doesn’t go well, you would expect it to lesson or stop altogether. As a “modern woman,” you begin to wonder if you should simply take the bull by the horns and text first. Keeping it relevant to texting, however, the lack of it can appear to be a lack of interest when in reality, the man is simply a grown-up with a big-boy job, not much time, and no appreciation for the art of texting. I’m not going to bullshit you and say, “From now on, I’m going to take control and text first.” Puh-lease… When it’s right, it’s right and there won’t be these confusing mind games…
However, if mind games are being played, or both parties happen to have a stubborn streak, the lack of texts on the day after the first date might not indicate the success of the date at all. You start googling things like “after first date texting rules” and “should a girl text a guy first.” You read a Reddit thread like this one and realize maybe you were in the wrong because you never texted to make sure he got home safe and now you just look like a bitch. This makes it even more difficult to decipher if he’s just really busy or just not that into you. Was it because you mentioned you like British comedy? After 72 hours of spiteful, frustrated venting about this jerk that you barely even enjoyed hanging out with, you light up at the first sight of his text and all hope is renewed.
The pre-existing pattern to base the potential between you two might not matter. Though I’m very much an independent, career-oriented, “modern woman,” I still have very traditional views on dating and courtship… In the end, how it all plays out is as simple as this: It was a great date; you felt chemistry and lust, but he did not. Unfortunately, now you’re left wondering how soon you should text your response… A man who asks you to ask the waitress for another soda for him?